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Pogo
books by
Walt Kelly

Walt Kelly

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Potluck Pogo
Beau Pogo
Pogo, Prisoner of Love
The Pogo Poop Book

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comic artists

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Potluck Pogo

Copyright © 1954, 1955, by Walt Kelly

 LINES UPON A TRANQUIL BROW

Have you ever,
while pondering the ways of the morn,
Thought to save just a bit,
just a drop in the horn,
To pour in the evening or late afternoon
Or during the night when we’re
shining the moon?
Have you ever cried out,
while counting the snow,
Or watching the tomtit warble
hello . . .
“Break out the cigars, this life
is for squirrels;
We’re off to the drugstore
to whistle at girls”
?

Chapter 11954

Churchy:
We could of been talkin’ ’bout life an’ ever’thin’ else.

Porky:
If you talks ’bout life an’ ever’thin’ else...the ever’thin’ else gotta be death ...That what we gone talk ’bout?

Churchy:
Death!? Heck, no!

Porky:
Wull...you can’t have one with out you got t’other.

Churchy:
Seem to me that makes life a perty risky business.

Topic:

Death

Churchy:
Dag nab! I thunk us’d have a nice day of quarrelin’ an’ shoutin’ an’ you is spoilt the whole discussion... You is got me to thinkin’...

Chapter 2 “I can handle my dukes but somebody keep an eye on the duchess.”
Chapter 31954

Owl:
S’pose he do keep quiet. How’s he know it’s a bona fide secret? All the worl’ might know! Test it! Tell it! If folks is shocked or sickened, he’ll know it was a secret.

Topics:

Rationalizing

Secrets

Chapter 8

Churchy:
They ain’t nothin’ worse nor un-ignited love...’cept fried parsnips an’ coddled watermillion.

Albert:
Addled turtle is extremefully loathful too...

Churchy:
Any kind of cooked turtle upset me somethin’ awful.

Chapter 9 A woman’s not always a woman but a good cigar is a horse of another feather.

Quoted by:

Tom Robbins

Topic:

Amusing one-liners

1954

Churchy:
Haugh.. Some folks got all the taste an’ finer sensibilities of a can of warm bait.

Topic:

Insults

Churchy:
By jing! My Aunt Moomie was such a looker she could outstrip any theatricycle queen of today!

Bat:
Even without the modern zipper?

Chapter 21

Albert:
It’s enough to make a man think.

Owl:
You’re right! Desprit measures ought to be took!

Chapter 33

Reggie:
I wouldn’t drop ’im a line if he’d fell into the briny with the fo’c’sle grog...

Chapter 341954: 12-25

Porky:
Awake! Awake! Four a.m! Christmas is at hand an’ I brung you a flower I been savin’ since early June—tain’t nothin’ to kiss my hand for but—

Pogo:
I been waitin’ up for you. Grab aholt of these packages. We’s gonna sneak up on Wiley Catt’s an’ Sarcophagus Macabre’s and ol’ Simple J. Malarkey’s hangout, leave ’em outside the door an’ holler “Merry Christmas.”

Porky:
An’ after we hollers...then what?

Pogo:
Naturally, we’ll run.

Porky:
Phumph .. I admit it’s a highly embroidered li’l’ gesture .. Think it’ll do anybody any good?

Pogo:
Oh...mebbe jes’ only us.

text checked (see note) Apr 2005

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Beau Pogo

Copyright © 1958, 1959, 1960, by Walt Kelly

MEMO

Dear Children:

For some time now I have been meaning to write you and explain about morality in our time. We have recently discovered it, much to the chagrin of our peace of mind. It seems that the fast buck has been even more fleet of foot than the normally slippery brain, and in the race between the two the cerebral contestant has come in a bad second.

Topic:

Morality

Chapter 4

Baiting the Bait
c. 1959

Churchy:
I is had enough of you, Albert, to last me ’til the peaner butter season...

Chapter 5

Two Got, Three Got, For Got

Seminole Sam:
[...] I’m going to offer my “short-cut to complete amnesia” to both political parties to give to the voters.

Beauregard:
But a election is comin’ up... Them parties wants folks to remember all the good things they’s did.

Sam:
Brother! That ain’t never neither of their problems.

Topic:

Politicians

Chapter 7

The Monster Really

Albert:
[...] How do you spell “to-whom-it-may-concern”? Is “toohoomit” one word or two?

Beauregard:
Mayconcern” is one word... “Too hoomit” is two words... Any fool knows that.

Albert:
But I asked a partickler fool, not any fool.

Beauregard:
Don’t call me no partickler fool!

Albert:
Okay, you ain’t so partickler... Have it your way.

Chapter 21

Triple Prethink

Owl:
Trouble with you is you don’t use your brains... I’m usin’ mine constant!

Churchy:
I uses mine only in case of fire.

Owl:
From now on I’m dedicatin’ myself to thinkin’ for others... I’ll put my extra brain power to work... Charge big fees for formin’ opinions, decidin’ when to sneeze, etc., for busy executives.

Pogo:
You’ll be too busy to think for your own self.

Owl:
Hah! I’ll hire a research service for that... They’ll poll the pulse of all that’s fraught an’ give me the averages.

Pogo:
Only thing I don’t get is why don’t he do his own thinkin’?

Churchy:
How can he afford it at his prices?... He can get it done much cheaper on the outside.

Pogo:
But how could you find the conscience to do it?

Owl:
Easy... I pointed out to my conscience that this plan would make us a cool million an’ we’d both retire.

Topic:

Conscience

Chapter 25

Having Fine Time, Wish You Were Her

Note (Hal’s):
I’ve taken no quotes from this chapter, except its title, a great old joke of which I’m fond.

— end note

Chapter 27

Bugging Out
c. 1959

Owl:
Oh, it’s you! Talcum powder in a water pistol don’t seem to be the ultimate weapon, do it?

Topic:

Weaponry

Chapter 28

A Friend in Need

Owl:
First I’ll land an’ establish peace an’ law an’ order.

Churchy:
But s’pose they already got all that?

Owl:
Got all that? You mean modern peace? Up-to-date peace with all the latest weapons to protect it an’ all?

Churchy:
Or the ol’ fashioned kind.

Owl:
In what category was that there?

Churchy:
It was very simple... Only one side had the ever-lovin’ peaceful weapons.

Topic:

War

Porky:
And as Shakespere said: “Denmark ain’t alone.

Chapter 29

Is a Friend Indeed?

Churchy:
It takes more’n one to start peace.

Porky:
He tole me we ain’t got a free press in this country... “Why, them papers costs up to a dime apiece...” he says, “Call that free? In my country,” he says, “there’s just one paper. Not a lot of opposin’ views... A man knows what to think...” “Yeh,” I says, “but even so they charges money for it...” “True,” he says, “but you got to remember, money ain’t worth as much in my country...” Well, I seed he had me an’ so I said good-bye.

Topic:

Logic (examples)

Chapter 40

Setting the Wrecker Straight

Miz Beaver:
You can’t trust men... They say this an’ say that an’ if any of it’s the truth it’s prob’ly a lie.

text checked (see note) Apr 2005

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Pogo, Prisoner of Love

Copyright © 1969, by Walt Kelly

included in Walt Kelly’s Pogo Romances Recaptured

Copyright © 1975 by Selby Kelly, executrix for the estate of Walt Kelly

The Good Old Oldtime New Start

We have had constant revolution since the year One because we like to start anew, our way. Having fouled up one home, we leave our litter behind to write a brave new constitution in a land far off and considerably upwind from the dump.

But now, through lack of space, we have to face each other in the dark and uneasy environs of the familiar. So it occurs to the cartoonist that the easiest war is the one in the home where railing males and females, family bound, can relieve the tedium with the age-old fight of love.

Chapter 1

The Truest Lie is Youth Remembered
1953 2-1

Albert:
How do you know when you’re an adult?

Pogo:
It’s largely a matter of lookin’ back .... and not countin’ your mistakes.

Topic:

Maturity

2-4

Pogo:
How come we’s the kind of people what allus gotta walk home from a boat ride?

Chapter 2

Some Early Threat of Promise
2-8

Porky:
Pie’s good for you... Cleans up warts an’ all.

Pogo:
It’s my favorite vitamin.

Topic:

Pie

Chapter 4

The Impossible Possibled
2-28

Albert:
We’re gonna secede and start a new country.

Pogo:
Why in the worl’?

Albert:
So things will be more equal for all an’ we’ll all share more better.

Pogo:
In that case I better eat the other half of my sammitch afore you shares the whole thing complete an’ independent...

Topic:

Government

Chapter 14

A Bustle of Muscle
5-22

Porky:
Law an’ justice ain’t always compatibobble. In a lot of cases it’s law vs justice.

Topics:

Law

Justice

Chapter 16

Gackscraggle Explored
6-2

Beauregard:
I’m havin’ a time with the new anthem for our secessionary land.

Church:
You is come to the right spot; listen...

I thought that I
would never say

A day was lovelier nor May

’Til my heartstrings
plucked the tune

The rareness of a day in June.

Beauregard:
... Gackscraggle! A man can’t secede from his beloved Fatherland with a anthem like that.

Church:
No, huh?

Beauregard:
It ain’t got no patriotics.

Topic:

Patriotism

Chapter 25

A Reign of Rain
8-20

Pogo (sings):

Oh, the dog days of life
are those nights when the gloom

of the August arises like heat.

While my heart is
a-squand’ring the dank afternoom

And my braw Love
I never shall meet.

Topic:

Summer

8-22

Pogo (sings):

The flowers of my heart

Bloom late in life;

At last the rose and daisy!

Not so much ’cause
there’s been such strife

It’s just I’m sort of lazy~~~

Topic:

Love

text checked (see note) Apr 2005; June 2013

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The Pogo Poop Book

included in Walt Kelly’s Pogo Revisited

Copyright © 1957, 1959, 1960, 1961, 1962, 1966, 1974 by Walt Kelly

One Way Street

Now, really, how arch

Can you be when you march

With a spear;

With a sword?

You belong

To a curious team,

You’re in the extreme,

Maybe left,

Maybe right,

Maybe wrong.

Low Down on the Top
or The Brothers Grim.

Fun, like God, is declared dead every once in a while. Every movement—the new left, the new right, the new middle, the new church—should have its own court jester. If he can teach each of the militants to laugh at itself it would be useful, if only for that distant day when there would be nobody else to act as target. The apparent objective of any of these movements seems to be the complete obliteration of all other dedicated thinkers.

As our people move in all directions with great grim purpose the safety valve of humor seems to be missing. Humor is not escape. Sleep is escape. Humor is relief. The laugh of finding out the other fellow is funny because he is the enemy is not enough.

Topic:

Humor

Mouse into Elephant

Frump:
That’s the way it is, darling ... We can always deliver a miracle ... but would we want to live with it? I could clean up this alley, but how would we find our way around in the dark?

Topic:

Miracles

The Computer-Commuter
A Tragedy

Perhaps you have wondered over the years why most scientists who invent inhuman devices or human machines are usually described as “mad.” The reason they are mad is that they have such a devilish time nailing their inventions together. Each keeps hammering himself on the thumbs. And, inasmuch as such a genius is all thumbs anyway, this gives him a lot to be mad about.

Topic:

Genius

“How do you start a thing like this?”

“It ain’t how it starts, it’s how it winds up.”

Whose God Is Dead?

Deacon:
Simple! First, you found a church, then you find a God that fits it ~~~ If it turns out that the God doesn’t fit in a while ~~~ BOOM! he’s dead and you advertise for a new one. After all, if a man invents a church, who should be in charge?

Topic:

Churches

GOD IS NOT DEAD
He is merely unemployed...

text checked (see note) Dec 2007

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Background graphic copyright © 2003 by Hal Keen